Mother

Why are you so hard on me? Are you punishing me because you think I don’t do enough? I try my best. I give as much as I can. Do you regret the way you brought me up? You can’t blame me for that. And you should see me in a different light sometimes. Not always the stale servant of social expectations. The three words in your dictionary I am not going to learn; accountant, doctor, lawyer. I am not going to be a puppet of money.

Tweets on Tees

“Let’s go back to myspace and you can twitter all over my facebook.”

Oh where can I get nails like this…

Pocketful of Dreams

Johnny’s got a pocketful of dreams -
it’s patched and there are cakecrumbs in the seams -
to you it may not be a lot
but all the treasure Johnny’s got,
he carries in his pocketful of dreams -
a beetle in a match box, a tiny piece of string,
some sealing wax and carpet tacks,
a bell that doesn’t ring -
When Johnny grows up to be a man,
into a world that’s tough,
he’ll soon be told his pocketful of dreams
won’t be enough -
but if he owns a great big car,
a swimming pool and yacht,
he’ll never be as happy
as the time when all he’s got
is a beetle in a match box, a tiny piece of string,
some sealing wax and carpet tacks,
a bell that doesn’t ring…..

Gilbert Highet

“These are not books, lumps of lifeless paper, but minds alive on the shelves. From each of them goes out its own voice… and just as the touch of a button on our set will fill the room with music, so by taking down one of these volumes and opening it, one can call into range the voice of a man far distant in time and space, and hear him speaking to us, mind to mind, heart to heart.”

Demetri Martin

“I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.”

The Victory Cafe, Brooklyn, New York.

I’m placing this here so I don’t forget this place…

Peter McWilliams

“To avoid situations in which you might make mistakes may be the biggest mistake of all.”

Mama and child handmade book

This would be perfect for mother’s day, filled with memories…

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=14333118

 

Customers

If you’re in retail, one of those awkward moments for you, is when you have explained something to a customer but they reply with an answer which shows they do not understand what you’ve just said to them. And you’re thinking…I really cannot put this in a simpler way, I’m not sure if I should be rude and just repeat what I’ve said to try and make them understand because maybe they didn’t hear, or….maybe they heard and just aren’t processing english today so I’ll just say ‘ok’ to whatever and finish this sale so I can move on.

e.g.

‘I’m sorry this letter you want to send is not going to get there tomorrow because it’s not within Australia Post’s Next Day Delivery express network.’

‘….(looks at me blankly)…I just want it to get there tomorrow.’

‘Yeah unfortunately we don’t do express to this particular area of Sydney, mainly because it’s too far away to get there the next day.’

‘….(stares at the counter space above his letter)…I just want it there by tomorrow’ (blinks justifiedly).

And here’s when I’m looking at him looking blankly at me like he hasn’t listened to a word I just said, he probably just saw my mouth moving but nothing went into his ear and through to his brain that processed correctly. I feel like saying to him ‘LOOK FUCKHEAD, YOUR LETTER AIN’T GONNA GET THERE TOMORROW COZ YOU FUCKING LEFT IT TOO LATE YOU SON OF A BITCH. SO YOU BETTER START DRIVING RIGHT NOW TO MAKE SURE YOU CAN GET IT THERE TOMORROW YOURSELF, YOU FUCKING MATE OF A MATE.’